Staycation-ed

This weekend felt like a vacation.  We ventured no further than a few miles from home, but I felt like I couldn't have been farther away from real life.  Here are a few tips I used this weekend that may help to reproduce that staycation feel.

1. Find a really awesome staycation partner who is available all weekend (hint: boyfriends work perfectly for this).
2. Make a pact that you will only plan when it feels natural.  No need to map out every detail of Sunday when it's only Friday afternoon.  Minimal preparation may be required, but the minute planning feels exhausting, give it up.  This especially pertains to the small, minute details.  It doesn't really matter if you shower then have lunch, or have lunch then shower.  You'll figure it out in the moment.
3. Incorporate family (or friends who feel like family) for part of a day.  In our case we brunched and explored with mom and dad.  It was the perfect way to introduce new conversation.
4. Do something active.  Shoot some hoops, play a game of tennis, go for a walk.  Doesn't matter what the activity is, you feel better when you get the blood moving.
5. Pick one day to forgo primping.  Ladies, this means no makeup, no blow drying, just au naturale.  Gentlemen, put down the razor.
6. Buy yourself something small, but special.  I chose a new bag, he picked up a few pairs of work pants after I told him his butt looked even better than usual in khaki.
7. Cook.  It doesn't have to be anything complex, but make sure to prepare at least one meal from scratch. Not only is it healthier for your body, it gives a great feeling of accomplishment and togetherness.
8. Snuggle, cuddle, bury yourself under covers.  
9. Find at least one hour to be awake and a alone.  Do whatever you like with that hour (read, go for a run, play that new game on your iPhone), but do not allow any interruptions.
10. Drink wine at lunch.  No, I'm not promoting alcoholism or other unhealthy habits, but instead I'm endorsing any activity that feels special in it's own right.  

Let me know how it goes next weekend.

pic: weheartit 

Controll-ed Freak

So a lot has happened since we last spoke.  For one, I'm actually enjoying my job, which perhaps in part explains my blogging absence.  It is amazing what a little recognition and an extra responsibility or two does for the morale. 

I also have been working on a new mantra: Don't fight it.

In the past, I spoke about energy.  I explored the idea that we only have a finite amount of force that we can dedicate to the world.  Sometimes we unnecessarily spend energy on things we cannot control.  I found that I was spending a lot of time and energy on trying to change a world that was built with me in mind.  And believe it or not, life is pretty self-sufficient.  You don't have to plan out every minute of every day because life will figure it out without any help from you.

But life can also be pretty cooperative.  When you come up with a reasonable plan, it will allow you to take the reigns and make it happen.  So, in essence, we just have to figure out where we want to use our energy, because life will take care of the rest.

This may be a bit of a weird stretch, but think of it like your respiratory system.  Your lungs will continue to take in and exhale air regardless of whether you tell it to.  But, you can also make a conscious effort to take a big calming breath.

Do not fight what you cannot control.  But take control of what you can and use it to your advantage.

I'm sure this is the slogan of some 'take back your world' seminar that I am too cheap and too cynical to pay for, but I'm owning it and living it anyways.

There are so many times when I fight things that have not even happened yet or that will happen regardless of what I do.

Once you understand that sometimes there are things that you simply cannot change--and that this is okay, in fact, it is normal--you can go about changing those things that you can.  Just accept that, for some reason or another, this world was made for you.

Tuck-ed away for a rainy day.

A good friend just made a bold move to pick up her life and shift it to the West Coast in pursuit of sunshine, happiness and truth.  A fellow blogger, and often the source of inspiration for -ed chronicle posts, she asked what had happened to my blog.  The last post published in late June.

"I'm just kinda...happy." I replied. 

When you think about some of the literature world's best known authors, one can conclude that happiness is not the best inspiration.  It is rare that a masterpiece sprouts from bliss.  Instead, one's best life work often is born from inner turmoil.  Think Poe, Hemingway, van Gogh.

But, she offered an interesting thought.  Happiness is a fleeting thing.  An entity that changes with the seasons, the circumstances, the hour.  It is important to preserve it in whatever form you can so that you can still find it in those moments it disappears.

What is it that makes you happy?

A feeling of accomplishment, acceptance, self-fulfillment?  Coming home to a big smile and loving arms at the end of the day?  Savoring the little things, without losing sight of the bigger picture?  Whatever it is that makes up your version of bliss--save it.  Tuck it away in a pocket for a rainy day.  Because sometimes it's just as difficult to find as it is to keep.

Wishing you bliss, Thursday evening sangria and tapas, and everything you're looking for.

Review-ed.

At work we're doing mid-year reviews.  It's easy to look back on the past 6 months and pick out the trademark events that chart your progress professionally.  Earned revenue, profit margin, inventory.  Business is meant to be measured quantitatively.  But how does one measure a personal life.  In daylight, in sunsets, in midnights, in cups of coffee, in inches, in miles, in laughter in strife? (Rent reference).

I thought it might be a fun exercise to try.  In the past 6 months...

1.   I have renewed a lease, signing on for another year in this magnificent city we call NYC.
2.   I said my first whispered 'I love you' to the number one man in my life.
3.   I made a trip back to my favorite country in the world, and climbed (in a cable car) to the highest point in Europe.
4.   I skied, I beached, I hiked, and I rollercoastered.
5.   I saw two friends wed, and one baby cousin born.
6.   I said goodbye to the best puppy there ever was.
7.   I lived through the best birthday party and worst hangover of my life.
8.   I witnessed my first grand slam. (Go Posada!)
9.   I enjoyed 5 days in paradise with 5 of the best friends a girl could have.
10. I learned that sometimes, you just have to have faith.  And a cupcake.
11. I shared birthdays, paid visits to out of town friends, and encouraged the dreams of those around me.
12. I took the time to breath it all in because life really is measured in daylight, in sunsets, in midnights, in cups of coffee. 

Take a mid-year life inventory.  It's amazing how much you've done. Cheers to another brilliant six months!

I promise I'll be back again before then, though.

Balanc-ed in moderation.

Ah, it is amazing what a restful weekend can do for the soul!  Sometimes there is nothing sweeter than being in bed by midnight with tired legs, a fully tummy, and a happy heart.
Today productivity started strong, and lagged after lunch, though I don't feel bad about taking a little me time today.  The attempted theme of this week is balance, what should be a life theme, I think.  And so I will give myself some blog browsing time if it means I'll bang out the 30 grant payments waiting to be processed tomorrow morning.  I will take the trip home tomorrow night for dinner with baby sis, and maybe fit in a tennis session to feed my need for a good run around before bed.  I will skip the gym for a catch up session with the girls later this week.  I often get lost in the 'need to do,' 'should really,' and 'wish I did's of life.  It's time to recognize the 'sure, why not's.

It doesn't matter how many times it is said, we always forget that the to do list will be there tomorrow.  A good life, like a good drink, should have equal parts sweetness, tart, and spice.  May you be drunk with happiness this week.  But remember, all in moderation.

Undecid-ed: Lame or Not?

It's Friday evening and the greatest decision of the week stands before me.

Do I catch up on a sleepless and workout-less week of vacation with a long run, a dose of exploratory wandering in a new neighborhood in search of a good cup of coffee and a quiet spot in a corner cafe to do a little studying before stumbling home under the bright NY weekend sky to bed?

OR

Do I rally the troops, attend a small dinner party with friends and friends of friends which will inevitably turn into a drink party with dancing, joking, and general tom-foolery?

Essentially, do I spend the evening in my own company or in the company of others?  It's a tricky answer.  Some nights, a solo date is the perfect way to spend an evening, but other nights it can be disastrous for the human psyche.

The greatest decision of the week: to be lame or not to be lame?

pics: weheartit.

Peak-ed into the Future.

As my plane landed last night, a sinking feeling began to grow in my stomach.  A sinking feeling that it was over; that our vacation was coming to a close, and reality would tuck away all of the good things in life until the next time we hit the beach.  And a sinking feeling that I'd never leave again, forgetting that I'm lucky enough to have another trip planned two weeks from now.

How do our brains have a way of making everything so final sometimes?

Today sitting at my desk, I had to remind myself there will always be a next new big thing.  That just because one event, one experience, one day is over, it does not mean that there won't be an even better one to follow.  There will always be something to look forward to, no matter how small.  In fact, life isn't always about the big things.  It's about the anxious feeling of cracking open a new notebook on the first day of class.  It's about the dizzy laughter you share over crisp white wine on the first days of summer.  It's about the hugs you get walking through the door back home. 

Life's landscape is not a steady climb, but a jagged, twisting path dipping into valleys and soaring to the peaks above the clouds.  The best climbers understand that there is just as much beauty in the valley as there is from the top.